© Copyright 2008 Tink *~*~*
It’s not easy being the parent of a child star these days, especially when your child is a DISNEY star. We’ve been pretty much besieged ever since my darling little girl-illa was born. So much activity, so many people to see, so much of our lives played out in the spotlight. I tell you, sometimes I feel like we live in a zoo! Well, if you were paying attention during the late 90s/early 00s, you know that Disney’s Animal Kingdom is “nahtazoo”, but it still feels like one at times. On this particular day, the baby and I were just hangin’ out in the clearing up on that little hill in the forest, trying to take a little nap – but there were a lot of those noisy humans congregating on the bridge, and sleep wasn’t coming.
I think one of them was aggravating one of the boys across the ravine; a Cast Member had to go and put a stop to whatever shennanigans were going on over there. I decided it was too much for us to tolerate, so I thought of another resting spot and relocated. Clutching my little princess tightly to my chest with one hand (which makes me sort of lope along sideways on my other three limbs), I scrambled over the hill to a nice little rocky enclave where I’d stashed the baby’s pink receiving blanket. There we settled in, hoping to get a little rest.
Well, we were both nearly asleep when those damned paparazzi figured out where we’d gotten to and descended en masse upon the glass enclosure! Ridiculous amounts of flash ensued – I mean, don’t these people read the manual when they buy these newfangled point-and-shoot cameras? If they did, they’d know we were too far away for the flash to help their pictures, but close enough for it to nearly blind us when we looked up. And I hate to be the one to tell them this, but you know all those pictures they thought they were getting of my child, the little girl-illa star? Well, I’ll just bet you that all those pictures turned out horrible – just blobs of light bouncing off the glass. Silly, silly humans!
By this time, I was just really grumpy – I mean, wouldn’t you be? All I wanted to do was catch a nap and see to it that my little princess was properly fed and rested. I am starting to rethink this Disney child star thing… maybe we should move far, far away and dye our hair and that sort of thing, live in disguise for a few years until all of this blows over. I honestly don’t understand what all the fuss is about. Children are born every day! There’s nothing extraordinary about that. I mean, if all those peoples with their cameras, ooo-ing and ahhh-ing all over the place think she is so special, they can just come on in and take a turn at changing her diaper! Then we’ll see what the definition of “special” is… anyway, I was done, I tell you – D-O-N-E, done! Carefully cradling my princess once more, I mustered all the dignity I could and stalked off into the brush to hide…